the plan

two days, i've recently disocovered, is plenty of time for everything to become the opposite of what you want it to be, and then become something else that could be something you want it to be, if you smoke enough cigarettes, eat enough donuts, and breathe in, and out, slowly, in the warm evening air, contemplating everything that was and is and will be, and then tuck yourself in and concentrate on the feeling of your lungs contracting and expanding as you wait for sleep and then for the alarm to go off in the morning, far earlier than you ever wanted it to.