My Colloquium is in Six Days.

I'm currently interning at a publishing house. We forward fan mail to our authors. Today I forwarded a box filled with individually wrapped Christmas presents (from the same person) to a public figure whom you may be familiar with. He is a doctor and his name rhymes with "Bill."

Contents of package:

- (1) XXXL brown vintage pepsi-cola t-shirt

- (1) white coffee mug with labrador retriever picture printed on side

- (1) package coffee beans

- (1) almond biscotti

- (2) pairs JERZEEZ work crew socks

- (1) bundle of negatives

- (1) pair black Budweiser slippers

- (2) McDonald's happy meal toy cars, still in packaging.

Completely unrelated but just as wonderful, here is a picture of a family friend, my uncle, my mother, and my father: